About Me And Why I Work With Men and Boys

About Me — And Why I Work With Men and Boys

Looking back, my childhood wasn’t “bad” in the obvious ways. I had the basics, a home, food, school. But what I didn’t have was the thing every child needs, emotional connection, guidance, and someone to help me make sense of my inner world.

I’m not sharing this from blame, and I’m not asking for sympathy. I’m sharing it from hindsight, from understanding.

For years, I blamed my past for my poor decisions, my difficulty understanding others, and the way I shut down emotionally. Without emotional regulation, without someone helping me name and navigate feelings, I learnt to internalise everything. And like many boys, that pattern was reinforced by outdated beliefs:

• Boys don’t cry.
• Man up.
• Get on with it.
• Vulnerability is weakness.

If you’re reading this, I’m sure parts of that feel familiar. Most men have lived some version of it.

It wasn’t until I began studying psychotherapy that things finally clicked. I started to understand myself, not as “broken”, but as someone who never had the emotional tools in the first place. I realised that being my true self meant letting people in. That terrified me. Even after having therapy myself, I didn’t know what opening up would look like, or how to do it without feeling exposed.

But slowly, I learnt. And that changed everything.

Why I Work With Men

Part of my drive comes from my own story, but another part comes from the men I’ve known and lost.

I’ve had friends, and known of friends, who took their own lives. Not because they wanted to die, but because they wanted the emotional pain to stop. They felt alone, overwhelmed, and trapped inside an inner world they didn’t know how to express.

And this isn’t rare.

In the UK, 75% of deaths by suicide are male. And around 25–30% of those men had reached out for help beforehand.

That tells us something crucial: Men are asking for help, but something in the system isn’t working for them.

Many men don’t know how to talk about what’s going on inside. They don’t know how to express themselves without feeling weak, ashamed, or exposed. For some, even thinking about vulnerability feels alien or gut‑wrenching.

My work is about changing that.

I want to reach the men who grew up like I did, men who learnt to cope by shutting down, staying silent, or performing strength instead of feeling it. Men who struggle to express themselves, feel disconnected from partners or family, or carry shame for things they never had the tools to handle.

I want to help men and boys understand their emotional blocks, reconnect with themselves, and build healthier relationships with the people they care about. Not by forcing vulnerability, but by creating a space where it finally feels safe.

A Question For You

What would it feel like to drop the mask you’ve been wearing for years?

To put down the protective shield you built as a boy, the one that kept you safe then, but keeps you distant now?

What would it be like to be seen properly, maybe for the first time?

What would you feel? What would you gain? What might finally become possible?

If You’re Ready to Explore More

If any part of this speaks to you — if you’re tired of carrying everything alone, tired of feeling misunderstood, or simply curious about who you could be without the weight you’ve been holding — you don’t have to face that journey by yourself.

If you’re willing to go within, to explore more about yourself, and to understand what’s been blocking you, contact me.

Don’t do this alone. Because you’re not alone.

Empowered To Be – Counselling for Men and Boys Newton Abbot, Devon & Online UK‑wide

Phone: 0752 121 3796 

Email: info@empoweredtobe.co.uk 

Website: www.empoweredtobe.co.uk

Experienced professionals dedicated to your success.

Proven results that speak for themselves.